Authenticity is what I strive for in everything that I do. Because of this, I feel it’s necessary to let you in on my current mental, emotional, and physical state.
This week has been hard. Every day I have woken up with an overwhelming feeling of defeat. I’m not sure where it stems from. It could be the realization of loss starting to sink in, or a side effect of cabin fever. Regardless, it stinks.
I’m the kind of person who likes to have a routine that includes changes in scenery. Otherwise, I become extremely complacent and therefore, unmotivated. You can understand why being quarantined is truly a nightmare for me.
I’m scared. I’m scared that I’m not doing enough. I’m scared for my mom who works in the hospital. I’m scared for the world. I constantly think about how this pandemic will affect the reality we used to know.
I talk a lot about the importance of having a positive mindset. That’s something that’s really important to me. However, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t struggling in the positivity department this week.
This is my off-week and I’m owning it. I am choosing to allow myself to sit in this funk for seven days. Seven days of eating junk food, lying on the couch, skipping my routine, procrastinating, and feeling sorry for myself. I think that’s what I need to move on.
Once my seven day grace period is up, I already have a plan of action set in place that will help me get my life back on track. It includes a new routine (of course lol) and a reminder of goals and things to look forward to.
I’m taking a break. And I’ll be better because of it.
Discovering Balance: What Feeling Healthy Means to Me 
I appreciate your authenticity. This loss is real for all Seniors and should be acknowledged and grieved. Allowing yourself to go through the stages of grief in this way will help you heal.
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I feel the exact same way with everything that has been happening with COVID-19. It is really difficult to completely change your routine when you were used to the one you had before, and trust me I have my days where I am just in a complete funk and don’t know what to do.
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I feel you, this new reality is strange and weird and everyday I wake up hoping something will change or there will be an announcement like you are free….yet that’s not the case and won’t be the case for a while. It’s like being trapped in one of those movies where the days repeat yet obviously each days a bit different, and you can break the rules and hang out which some days I’m tempted to do but would never because I’m ready for this to end. I feel schools a lot because it helps to keep me busy and to know I have something to do but once school stops and it’s summer with nowhere to go that’s when I worry when my motivation to do things will be totally gone. The unknown of the future brings about lots of worry.
I like how you can realize you’re in a funk and it’s ok to be that way every once in a while. We can’t be positive 24/7 which is ok as well. I love your motivation, even in this period and during your 7 day grace time you already have a plan. I think that’s awesome and I wish I could be like that. I set up a plan but 10/10 it never goes that way. I wake up with the plan and motivation to do it but then I lose it and it just flops🙃
-Kristen
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